<![CDATA[Graffë Forums - Blogs - Grindel's Lil' Midlife Crisis Online by Grindel]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/blog.php?396-Grindel-s-Lil-Midlife-Crisis-Online en Wed, 13 May 2026 21:28:29 GMT vBulletin 60 https://www.graffes.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg <![CDATA[Graffë Forums - Blogs - Grindel's Lil' Midlife Crisis Online by Grindel]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/blog.php?396-Grindel-s-Lil-Midlife-Crisis-Online Dear Penthouse Forum, https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?245-Dear-Penthouse-Forum Mon, 19 Jul 2010 14:50:48 GMT If I had any idea that my attending classes surrounded by 19-year-old co-eds would turn my wife into a borderline nymphomaniac, I would have figured out a way to have done this years ago.

And it's not that I'm even remotely interested in these girls - to be perfectly honest they may as well be a separate species to me as far as I'm concerned. But wow, not that I'm complaining but it's amazing what a woman will change to keep her man from doing the whole midlife trade younger thing. I'm thinking of maybe planning on getting a sports car in a few years ;)

The other main point I've picked up from this summer term at Creighton? At some point in my late 20s I decided that all college kids were clueless mouth-breathing morons who couldn't tell their asses from their elbows. Except for me when I was in college, of course.

I was wrong; there are some smart cookies wandering about. Good for them. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?245-Dear-Penthouse-Forum Drive-Throughs - Who Thought of This Crap? https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?244-Drive-Throughs-Who-Thought-of-This-Crap Wed, 14 Jul 2010 16:35:01 GMT So... why is it that lately every drive-through you come to has a ton of landscaping done between the speaker and the window where you pay your money. Yah the flowers are pretty and all but...

dude, BEES.

You put a bunch of flowers somewhere and guess what's going to show up? You do realize that some people (not me, thankfully) are frigging allergic to bee stings and will die for wont of a bacon cheeseburger?

I'm sure it was some landscaper who submitted the article to Drive-Through Windows Quarterly Magazine and all, but certainly someone had to stop and think "uh, won't a bunch of flowers at the same level as your typical sedan window and maybe 12 inches away going to attract bees"?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only human on the planet who's still capable of rational thought. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?244-Drive-Throughs-Who-Thought-of-This-Crap <![CDATA[If You're in the Omaha Metro Area, Avoid Centris Credit Union]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?243-If-You-re-in-the-Omaha-Metro-Area-Avoid-Centris-Credit-Union Tue, 08 Jun 2010 20:19:17 GMT Not because they've done something horrendous - I don't even bank there.

But I went in there today for a very simple request - I need two rolls of pennies for my vacation bible school class tonight. There is no front desk, just some personal banker schmuck fresh out of college. I tell him what I need and he tells me to go to the equivalent of a drive-through shoot complete with a tube, but inside the doggone lobby.

I imagine the actual tellers live in caves under the bank or something. Who knows.

Anyhow, he was like "just enter your account number, blah blah blah". WTF I just want a roll of pennies. "Well we need your account number so we can track overages and things, so our tellers don't come up short". Short a fucking DOLLAR? I do not have an account with you guys. You're a bank, I just want to exchange currency from one form to another. Isn't that what banks do?????

So now I have to rush to a freaking grocery store on my way to church to get a roll of pennies. If Centris wants to be so insular that you have to have an open account to get fricking pennies then they shouldn't have access to any of my tax dollars for anything at all, up to and including deposit insurance on the accounts the do carry. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?243-If-You-re-in-the-Omaha-Metro-Area-Avoid-Centris-Credit-Union <![CDATA[Dr. McGrindel's Healthy Living Tips (NSFW)]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?241-Dr-McGrindel-s-Healthy-Living-Tips-(NSFW) Mon, 24 May 2010 02:17:34 GMT Dear friends: It is a good thing to experiment about with various forms of birth control if doing so is not against your religion and if you or your spouse are not up for having more rug rats. However, there are perils involved, one of which I would like to bring to your attention. The... Dear friends:

It is a good thing to experiment about with various forms of birth control if doing so is not against your religion and if you or your spouse are not up for having more rug rats. However, there are perils involved, one of which I would like to bring to your attention.

The sponge is a fancy device that's supposed to gather up your wrigglers and murder them with spermicide. Seems like a decent plan of action. But please, please heed the following warning:

Do not engage in prolonged cunnilingus when the sponge is in place. Just do not do it.

The spermicide will take great delight in numbing your tongue and quite likely your lower lip. That is a less romantic development than it sounds, and it sounds lousy. Strike 1.

Also, prolonged sexual activity can turn that motherfucker 180 degrees, right inside the vaginal canal. That may sound like some sort of high-5 kick-ass manly development, but let me tell you. There is a string you're supposed to grasp to remove the sponge, and if the thing is flipped 180 well good luck removing it without handy gynecological equipment. Steeerike 2.

So in conclusion, tread carefully. Mr. Squarepants may seem friendly at first gasp, but considering that his goal in life is to murder your potential progeny it's no surprise he's apt to be evil from time to time. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?241-Dr-McGrindel-s-Healthy-Living-Tips-(NSFW) Too Much Gaming https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?240-Too-Much-Gaming Thu, 29 Apr 2010 01:06:16 GMT So my son is down here and he decided he wants to play "Modern Warfare 2". He picked up his two nerf dart guns and started running around going "beeeeowwwnn! beeeyown!" and shaking 'em like crazy. I was about to call him a G18 newb and then it dawned on me where he picked that up from O_o ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?240-Too-Much-Gaming <![CDATA[As we say in NE and you probably say in TN: Fool me ... you can't get fooled again.]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?239-As-we-say-in-NE-and-you-probably-say-in-TN-Fool-me-you-can-t-get-fooled-again Wed, 10 Mar 2010 18:06:39 GMT Well I sort of figured this might happen, but I didn't think it'd happen quite so soon.

Two years ago, I was working at a pretty good spot - I was sliding toward upper middle class and boy, it was nice to have the money and security. But my boss was completely unqualified for his position. I was hired and then the second day I was there, the guy who hired me left the company and this former used car salesman took his place. We did not get along well (nobody got along with him). At the same time, I also had a side contracting gig I still did from back when I was out doing my own thing that brought in some cash too. Things were nice. Nice vacations, nice money in my pocket, just nice.

Well, the side gig people - my former bosses from two divisions within the old company basically, came to me with what they pitched as a sweetheart deal - I could work as a contractor directly with them, from home. I'd have a new gig with them at a very, very high hourly rate plus I'd retain my side gig too, which was good for another $20k. All I'd have to do was leave the security of the election place and the crummy boss and the outside agency that was already forcing people out, and go work with them.

It was very, very nice while it lasted. I was a liaison with an offshore company in India, which meant most of my work hours were between 8-11pm and 6-9am. The side gig work disappeared, but really I didn't notice. The money was still good! Perhaps I didn't notice as much because I was spending a ton of time playing WoW as well, since there were several days where I didn't have anything to do.

But of course it didn't last. The company is renown for its instability, and about a year ago last November I was told the work was gone. Remember when the economy first started heading into the toilet? Yah, that was the marketplace I was dropped into - and there is generally NOTHING going on in IT between October and January since budgets are generally locked in by then.

It was a rough stretch of months until I started at the company that I'm at now. Very rough - in fact I still have credit card debt to fully dig out of that I had to accumulate to make ends meet.

Things have been going pretty well at this job. I earn less than I did before, but I work with a great staff and fun people in an awesome office. This is a Good Job, and the company is poised for a 3x to 5x growth spurt here soon.

Well, a couple weeks back, my old boss calls me. Guess what, that part time contracting gig is available again and at slightly more money than before. Part time, right? Right? Yes it's a part-time testing gig I am assured. So of course I jumped at the chance - if I play my cards right I can have all my debt besides my student loans paid off and I can get enough together maybe for the downpayment on the house in the neighborhood I want to move into. Woot! I don't mind working two jobs; it's not like I'm mining coal or something.

Well, this morning my old boss called. "Hey, what would you think about coming back here as a full-time contractor?"

Ugh. I KNEW this question would come up, but hell I figured he'd be patient enough to let me cash at least one or two of the contracting paychecks before he brought it up!

I just can't do it this time. I can't. One of my better friends, basically my work wife from that place, was JUST laid off a few weeks back. It's TOO unstable, and where I am now it's just too stable. It's more money than I'm making now, but still. It would mean I could go from doing 65 to 70 hours a week down to 45, but STILL. The first time I went into this I ended up burned. How could I put myself and my family in almost the same situation again? And the thing is, I truly like Mike. He's a good mentor and when he's ready to finally retire I'd love to be considered to replace him. But he's just asking too much - I couldn't begin to ask my wife to go through the rollercoaster we went through last November to February. It'd be irresponsible, and it'd be taking my eyes off the prize.

I don't know. Maybe sometimes the door revealed to you isn't opportunity, maybe sometimes it leads to a pit trap. I found the words to politely decline, but he'll ask again in six months or so. Bah, I'd just prefer to work out the length of this contract we already have and maybe move on to other things. I sure hope I don't look back on the choice I just made with the same regret I have when I look back at leaving the last place for them. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?239-As-we-say-in-NE-and-you-probably-say-in-TN-Fool-me-you-can-t-get-fooled-again I Can Do This! https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?238-I-Can-Do-This! Mon, 08 Mar 2010 22:48:39 GMT Someone once told me that you can speak things into existence. That is the vein in which I'm making this post.

Things I am working on in my life right now, in no particular order:
  • Taking two college courses, basically a couple of sophomore-level classes
  • Working my full-time job
  • Doing a considerable amount of contracting work on the side
  • Helping manage my wife's salon
  • Raising my son
  • Nurturing and improving my relationship with my wife
  • Doing the various projects my church wants
  • Being a decent Best Man for my brother-in-law's upcoming wedding
  • ...
  • ...
  • ...
  • Doing a lot of gaming

Which of these things is not like the other? Still, even keeping gaming as a minor distraction, that's a TON of work. Not just a ton of work, but a ton that I really cannot skimp on, in any area. I have got to do this. I pull this off for a year and I am set. Most of my bills will be paid, I'll have all my educational credentials in place, I'll be in a GREAT spot in life. It's like it's this rite of passage that I have to get through. I really have no idea what's on the other side, but I know that everything I've lived and done up to this point is a prelude to it.

If I can just keep going, if I can just keep from burning out. Mostly I worry about my health. I skimp on sleeping for three days and I'm pretty much guaranteed a sinus infection. Hmmm... maybe I should look into some sort of immune system booster? And then there's the 25lbs to lose, which really should be on that list too.

I CAN do this. I HAVE to do this. There are Great Things waiting for me... if I can just keep focused. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?238-I-Can-Do-This! <![CDATA[Isn't She Lovely?]]> https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?220-Isn-t-She-Lovely Tue, 12 Jan 2010 21:35:57 GMT I'm not even sure what direction I should approach this next topic. I don't want to come across as a jerk or stir up controversy or anything, mainly I just want to get some words down so they're out there for me to look at.

I regret that I never had a daughter of my own, to raise from birth.

Now do not get me wrong, I love my daughter. Although it's different, I love her as much as I love my son. Hell, I've helped raise her from when she was in elementary school to where she is now. But still...

But still, she calls someone else "daddy". Someone who really had very little to do with bringing her up. She doesn't look like me in any way, shape, or form and her progeny never will. When she sees me she doesn't really see a father, she sees "Chris". This bothers me probably more than it should, but it bothers me. It's not a failing in her either, it just is what it is.

And my wife is at an age where due to pre-existing conditions even if I managed to convince her to come around, it'd be horrendously selfish of me and dangerous to her for me to try and convince her to bear another child. She's closer to menopause now than to her age when she bore our son. So I guess that means that ship has sailed.

I don't know, I guess I always imagined I'd have a "daddy's little girl" to bring up, along with my son. And I am completely smitten by my baby granddaughter and she by me. I'll never treat her any differently than if she were my blood, just as I didn't treat her mother any differently. But still, that's not my baby girl. As precious as that little spirit is, as much as I will always love and cherish her, she's my daughter's baby girl and not mine.

There's a song by Stevie Wonder, probably his best in my opinion. I cry every time I hear it, both out of appreciation for how he's captured the love he has for his child, which I share and can empathize with, and out of remorse that the little baby girl's voice laughing on the track will never be the laughing voice of my little girl.

Isn't she lovely
Isn't she wonderful
Isn't she precious
Less than one minute old
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she
But isn't she lovely made from love

Isn't she pretty
Truly the angel's best
Boy, I'm so happy
We have been heaven blessed
I can't believe what God has done
Through us he's given life to one
But isn't she lovely made from love

Isn't she lovely
Life and love are the same
Life is Aisha
The meaning of her name
Londie, it could have not been done
Without you who conceived the one
That's so very lovely made from love
Naariah, if through some strange twist of fate you ever stumble across this page please understand that I love you as much as any man could ever possibly love his granddaughter. I can't think about you and do anything but smile. I just wish I could have made an auntie for you. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?220-Isn-t-She-Lovely Countering the Call to Truancy https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?195-Countering-the-Call-to-Truancy Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:18:21 GMT When I found out that my school district was one of the few who cow-towwed to fringe national politicians to block my son from watching his Commander-in-Chief give a presentation to call him to scholarship, the big, ugly mess that somehow passes for national politics suddenly landed at my front... When I found out that my school district was one of the few who cow-towwed to fringe national politicians to block my son from watching his Commander-in-Chief give a presentation to call him to scholarship, the big, ugly mess that somehow passes for national politics suddenly landed at my front door. It's somewhat amusing watching the partisans on either side snipe at each other, and certainly the President can take care of himself.

However, these fringe elements made the mistake of allowing their bile to get local.

You know, let the parties eviscerate each other - I can only hope they'll both die so we'll see real, practical politicians who are more interested in governance than consolidating power. Oh, who am I kidding? Won't happen; they're to in-bred with each other.

Anyhow, when this happened I decided to take action. I fired off a telephone call to our school district's superintendent, who had the assistant superintendent of curriculum call me back. The argument he presented was that the fifteen minutes of the president's speech would impact the school district's ability to teach to the goals the State of Nebraska has set. Sparing that tortured logic for a moment, he also assured me that the schools would have access to the speech if children wanted to watch it over lunches, study halls, etc.

Shortly after speaking with the assistant superintendent, I then met with our elementary school principal and made arrangements with him to allow my son to watch the speech.

About forty minutes prior to the airing of the speech, I called the principal back up. He was not even made aware of when the speech would be given. I had to tell him when it was airing and how he could access it. I can only hope that in three hours when my son is out of school I get a good report.

The superintendent office's decision has made this a much more local concern to me. In response, I drafted the letter below that is being sent to him, his boss, and the district's board of education. While I was told by the assistant that the decision was backed by the board, other sources are telling me that the decision was made by four bureaucrats within the office without consulting the board or the district's parent-teacher association. My school district's motto is "Where Patriotism is a Priority". They've certainly led me to exercise my patriotism in this.

The letter I sent follows, with my address redacted. If anyone wants to use it as a template to mail their own school board or the editor of their local paper, I'd be flattered. If We the People allow these fringe groups of national-level bullies to affect our schools, we have only ourselves to blame for the lack of education our children receive. Civics are neither a Republican nor a Democratic priority; they're an American priority.
CJ
Bellevue, NE

Mr. Jeffrey Rippe
Asst. Superintendent for Curriculum
Bellevue Public Schools
1600 Highway 370
Bellevue, NE 68005

Dear Mr. Rippe,

“Bellevue Public Schools – Where Patriotism is a Priority” – this message has not resonated as loudly to me as it has over these past few days. I want to thank you again for taking the time to speak with me via telephone this past Friday regarding our school district’s decision not to air President Obama’s appeal to scholarship to our children.

While I do not agree with the conclusions that you and your fellow administrators drew, I appreciate your taking the time to discuss those conclusions and your rationale to me. However, many of the students under our care have just missed an opportunity to become more civically involved – a goal that a district that values patriotism must certainly embrace. Regardless of party, our Commander-in-Chief holds an office that must be respected, though certainly not necessarily obeyed. Your decision to block our children’s access to our President not only eroded that respect for this President, but for the office of the Presidency as well. While it is not the responsibility of the school district to follow the president’s lead in all things, it is the school district’s responsibility to graduate educated, motivated citizens ready to tackle the myriad issues we are handing off to them. We just lost an opportunity to help do just that.

On a more personal note, in our telephone discussion you mentioned that the schools would have access to the President’s speech. If by access you meant the schools would have a live Internet connection then you were accurate – however the telephone calls I made indicate that none of the schools in the district I called even knew what time the President’s speech would air. I am given to taking a man at his word, and I can only assume someone dropped the ball in getting this information to the schools? What steps can I help take to ensure something like this does not happen again?

Finally, please keep in mind that while a small and vocal group has been successful in using their echo chamber to seem like they are a broad coalition, they are only a small fraction of Americans and of members of the Bellevue community. The school district was given a difficult decision certainly – neither decision would have satisfied everyone. I am dismayed that in a district that proclaims the priority of patriotism, the decision made was in opposition to civics and to personal educational responsibility.

Best regards,

CJ
]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?195-Countering-the-Call-to-Truancy OK Time to Admit it... https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?193-OK-Time-to-Admit-it Wed, 26 Aug 2009 17:43:57 GMT No, nothing shocking or horrifying, sorry!

But the truth is, I'm getting fat. My mental self-image and my physical self are not the same and haven't been for probably a couple years now. It didn't use to be that way - it wasn't THAT long ago that I was @46" chest and 32" waist. Somehow I've managed to stop the ever-increasing pants size train, but I'm really, really dissatisfied with where I'm at. Looking at pictures is disheartening, especially looking at my face. How'd I let this happen?

So what do I do? I know that I know that I know that if I stop drinking Mountain Dew cold turkey, that's a good 8 to 10 pounds there. Every time. But every time I think I have that habit kicked, along comes a late night and there I go reaching for the soda bottle to help me get through the next morning at work. And yes I know that diet mtn dew exists, but i can't get past the horrible taste.

We have a gym membership for the family, which now that I think about it I've paid over $4,500 into over the years and we've been there less than 10 times total. It's only like 10 minutes away, but where's the time to go? I have a treadmill downstairs, but where's the time to use it?

I know I don't eat right, especially for breakfast. Oh and especially for lunch =\ There's usually "no time" for a breakfast in the morning, so the people at the drive-through diner on the way to work know me by name. Two eggs scrambled and wheat toast nearly every morning can't be helping my cholesterol level. Neither can grabbing some fast food sandwich or another over lunch. I live 10 minutes from home and I am either there or at my wife's shop (five minutes away from work) every lunchtime. Why don't I pack myself a lunch in the mornings, or at night before bed? Why don't I make a lunch for myself when I'm at home over my lunch break? Why is it so hard to get back into these positive habits?

I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday and I was ashamed. I have got to do something about this. I'm not so far gone that I can't work my way back, but how do I stay ON that track once I step onto it? Dad's had a belly since I was at least ten, so maybe it's inevitable. In six years I'll be the same age he was when I was ten. But still, he's always carried it 10x better than I think I'm carrying it now. I have to believe there is a better path for me. I do not want to move from having that comfortable married weight into being unhealthily overweight, but signs are moving more in that direction than moving toward being fit.

Maybe I need to set some sort of competitive or economic goal or another. Maybe I need to take a good, long look at how I'm spending my time and see if I can make some positive changes that way.

Also I apologize to folks who have posted comments. I screwed up the approval process and I don't know how to un-screw-up it. I'll try and do better going forward, and also I'll only set certain posts to comment moderation. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?193-OK-Time-to-Admit-it Democrats Need to Stop Being Democrats When Discussing Health Care Reform https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?188-Democrats-Need-to-Stop-Being-Democrats-When-Discussing-Health-Care-Reform Tue, 11 Aug 2009 21:46:16 GMT This afternoon I received an email from one of the various interests out there on the Left arguing on behalf of health care reform. I have extreme reservations regarding the actual content of the House Bill as I’ve seen it, but in a general sense I am receptive of health care reform. However the... This afternoon I received an email from one of the various interests out there on the Left arguing on behalf of health care reform. I have extreme reservations regarding the actual content of the House Bill as I’ve seen it, but in a general sense I am receptive of health care reform. However the email I received pointed out to me glaringly why the Democrats have lost control of the discussion on reform.

Everything I learned about marketing, I learned in high school (with much, much appreciation to my high school marketing instructors). If there are two things that I have kept close to me that have served me well, it’s these two axioms: grab their attention, and don’t sell the steak - sell the sizzle. That stated, let’s take a look at the opening to the email, and then at the sizzle. First, the opening:

“As we've seen on TV over the past few weeks, the entrenched special interests are resorting to rumor-mongering and scare tactics in an effort to kill health insurance reform.

With rhetoric ramping up, it's time to arm yourself with the facts.”

Now don’t get me wrong, this is all accurate. But am I likely to read the next fifteen paragraphs with an opening like this? Or more importantly is the target of this email, someone interested in the topic of healthcare reform but not really interested enough to participate in its discussion, likely to invest the time to read the next fifteen paragraphs? Let’s be frank here – the opening is weak. And much more importantly, it positively wilts against the deluge of fear-mongering being hurled from the opposite side. And on to the sizzle:

“Facts About Health Care Reform

Why we need reform:

Over 46 million Americans have no medical coverage at all, millions more are under-insured or fear losing coverage. If we continue on our current path health care costs will continue to soar and within the next decade one out of every five dollars will be spent on health care.
This is unacceptable, the system is broken and we cannot postpone meaningful reform any longer.”

While noteworthy and factual, it just does not sizzle. “Euthenasia committees” sizzles. “You’ll have to wait six months to see a doctor about your cancer” sizzles. “Medicare is set to bankrupt the country, and now you want to socialize health care” sizzles.

It doesn’t matter in the sea of public opinion that all of the points above are either plain lies or gross misrepresentations of the issues. It sizzles; it sells. It talks to the middle class. The counter, the sizzle the email offers gets going by bringing up uninsured Americans? While it’s important to cover those uninsured 46 million, even uninsured Americans don’t view themselves as uninsured Americans. It may be denial, but they view poor Americans as uninsured Americans, and as such somebody else’s problem. Plus, 46 million is just too big to grasp. No, instead the Democrats need to work small, personally. They need to get past the collective solutions ideology and get down in the trenches and talk directly to Joe the underinsured office worker and Kate the future breast cancer survivor.

The piece makes an attempt that, when it discusses one out of five dollars. But we’re an audience, not dollars. Talk to me, not my money. Let’s punch the first paragraph up a bit, just by re-ordering the ideas presented and adding some flash.


“The last time Republicans and the health-industrial complex defeated health care reform was 1993. Since then, our care health costs have almost doubled. Has your income doubled? It’s more than quadrupled if you’re Bristol Meyers. It certainly has if you’re a multi-millionaire CEO of an HMO that pays hundreds of people to deny any of your claims.
No, if you’re like most of us your take-home pay hasn’t changed much, while your premiums go up and your coverage goes down. And now the same cabal of fat-cat politicians and CEOs are busy spreading lies to defeat health care reform again.

Can we really allow them the chance to double our health care costs again?

The truth is that most of us are one bad fall away from bankruptcy. The truth is that a corporation’s job is to maximize its profits, not to ensure you are healthy. And let’s be blunt – do you really trust some corporate executive thinking about his stock options to OK your cancer treatment instead of trusting your doctors? If your answer is yes, good! Keep your existing coverage. If your answer is no, we don’t want to make your decisions for you, we want to give you an option. Some friendly competition to help keep the Big Boys honest. And that competition means better prices for all of us, including Medicare recipients.”


Democrats, it’s OK to go after the ultra-wealthy. They’ve been going after the rest of us for decades. It’s OK to go after the oligarchs. It's OK to call liars by their name. It’s OK to press the Fear Button now and again – hope is the natural counter to fear, but so is Greater Fear. Stop playing softball with people playing dodge ball… because if you lose this battle it’s not your party that pays, it’s We the People. Stop being Democrats and start being citizens. Bloody a nose or two - once real reform is passed it will but just that much less expensive to treat the nosebleed. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?188-Democrats-Need-to-Stop-Being-Democrats-When-Discussing-Health-Care-Reform Political / Economic Definitions https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?183-Political-Economic-Definitions Tue, 04 Aug 2009 15:28:48 GMT In a lot of conversations we have around here, people throw around terms like 'liberal', 'conservative', etc. and I'm not sure they give the terms themselves much thought. Below are definitions I wrote up a couple months back on another board (with a couple minor edits to make the definitions more general to this board than specific to the other) that I think will help people understand what I mean when I use them in a discussion.

Quote Originally Posted by Conservative Definition
This is particularly difficult because right now even conservatives are pulling their hair out trying to define what "conservative" means. I'll purposefully avoid very specific positions because the purpose of this post is not to go through bullet points of one party's plank or another.

A conservative is someone inclined to look at individual effort to address any particular problem rather than a group effort. As such, a group of conservatives will generally be a patchwork quilt of individual interests that coincide in some places and are overlooked in others as long as those individual interests are addressed.

Generally speaking a conservative will look backward for direction on how to properly move forward, and is probably slower to embrace change or social disruption. But again at his or her heart a conservative is a 'rugged individualist' and embraces policies and lifestyles that reflect this. Some (but certainly not all) of these policies include strong property and contract rights, a minimum of government taxation and and intrusion, and a respect for individual liberty and rights.
Quote Originally Posted by Liberal Definition
To me, a liberal is someone more apt to look at the power of groups to affect outcomes where they feel an individual will not be able to do so. Liberals tend to be pragmatic or "idealistic" and more apt to go in different directions than the tried and true with less guarantee of a long-term successful outcome. After all, if A doesn't work there's always B and C.

Whereas a conservative would implement policies that assist capitalists in getting positive returns on investments, a liberal would be more interested in policies that, as paraphrased from Bill Clinton, would raise the water level for everybody in the boat. A liberal is not necessarily suspicious of government, although like anyone else he or she wants it to work efficiently -and toward a perceived greater good. A liberal isn't against personal interest (heck, no one is really, imho), but is more likely to see that interest as being served through group effort.
Quote Originally Posted by Moderate Definition
Ahh, the elusive, much-courted moderate. A moderate is someone who, well, takes moderate stances on positions. A moderate sees value in competing ideologies and may look for or hope for compromise or cooperation rather than endless confrontation.

Moderates tend to be more results-driven than ideologically driven. "If this party screwed up well, let's see what that party can do. Oh it screwed up too? Well let's give the other guys another chance." Moderates are not fond of gridlock or purposeful obstruction or delaying, as it gets in the way of getting X topic addressed so we can move on to Y. Moderates are much more comfortable than either liberals or conservatives with being only partially satisfied with how something works out.

Hmm one more thing to add - I think there is a bit of liberal, moderate, and conservative in all of us depending on what topic we're dealing with. Just like there is no purely capitalistic or socialistic country out there, there is no perfectly liberal or perfectly conservative person either. That, I'd say, is a rather moderate statement to make ;)
Quote Originally Posted by Socialist Definition
I would define a socialist as someone who supports an economic model that involves government ownership and distribution of means of production. But really it's any collective group that does the same.
Quote Originally Posted by Capitalist Definition
A capitalist is one who supports an economic model where the means of production are owned and accumulated by individuals rather than collectives or government.
It's worth noting that our political system is a mixture of liberal, conservative, and moderate influences, and our economy is a mixture of socialist and capitalist influences. None are pure, which is a Good Thing IMHO. Homogeny is really only useful when you're talking about milk. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?183-Political-Economic-Definitions Cherish Every Moment https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?181-Cherish-Every-Moment Wed, 29 Jul 2009 04:47:52 GMT Well let's give this a shot.

My son's seven years old now, and he'll be going into second grade in another month. He's seven. My god, he didn't weigh much more than seven pounds not too long ago. Anyhow, tonight he got himself into a little trouble. See, he's got this thing. He somehow manages to destroy every headset I ever bring into the house.

Every
single
one.

Don't believe me?



Those headphones survived most of my EQ career, and they were just the beginning. He's gone through four other sets since. I am wearing a backup pair of radio shack wireless headphones right now because yah there we go again another wired set down the drain. This time he absentmindedly chewed the cord just enough so one of the earpieces no longer gets sound.

This didn't bother me that much, but it did hurt me that he didn't tell me about it when it happened and he made me find out for myself. The headphones go to my main test rig, the one I let him surf around on next to me when I'm in my office. I don't know, maybe he figured since I never use them I'd never find out.

It's tough making your kid cry. I know just what levers to pull to impress upon him how his actions have disappointed me, and I hate myself for using them. I'm just glad I rarely have to. But tonight's lesson was "turn your heartache into positive change". If Boo has any superpower it's that he tends to make those around him, family and strangers alike, just happier. So when he's confronted with the knowledge that one of his actions hurt someone or made them sad or angry, he aches. His whole spirit aches. Tonight we worked on turning that ache into a vehicle to make better decisions. I hope the lesson stuck.

Somehow in the course of this we arrived on the topic of remembering, and he was talking about how he's too young to remember much. We shared a lot of memories, a lot of very happy memories. Of course there's a boundary there - there's only so far he can remember back, while I go back to Day Zero.

Weekends had always been Our Time. Julie was busy at the shop all Saturday, and this was before I started going to church, so all weekend it was him and me. The days really weren't all that different than they are now - we wake up and talk for a while, he asks me if he can turn on the TV or a game and I tell him no, we play for a while, then I cook a big breakfast. Always link sausage, every Saturday since he was old enough to chew; it's just our thing. The rest of the menu can change, but it's always link sausage. Then we go outside or to the library or park or something, or he has a cousin who's spent the night or somesuch, and we'll just chill and enjoy ourselves all day.

There's one difference now that I never realized was as big as it was - nap time. I really, really miss nap time. Boo is a very curious boy and the thought of sleeping when there's a million more things to do just drives him crazy. No matter how sleepy he was, he just never wanted to take a nap, ever. Once I'd get him down he'd be good for 2-3 hours but boy getting him down was a chore. Eventually I did get it down to a science though. Step One: Pillow fort. Every side dad's not on has a pillow around him. Step Two: "Son, what's a good boy do?" "Lay down and close eyes, daddy." Step Three: lay next to him and breathe deeply and slowly. Step Four, close whatever eye he could see until he dozed off. Step Five, the unplanned step, fall asleep next to him, likely propped up on my elbow or something else odd like that.

So for almost four years, we got to share nap time together. Not much unwinds you after a long week better than waking up at 2pm with your son's arm around you - seeing him sleeping safe and secure and feeling the awesome responsibility and reward of knowing that it's you who provided that security for him.

Tonight, after drying Boo's tears and saying our prayers, I hugged him and whispered to him, "son, what's a good boy do?"

He didn't know what I meant. I kissed him on the crown of his head and asked him to lay down and close his eyes. ]]> Grindel https://www.graffes.com/forums/entry.php?181-Cherish-Every-Moment